Screen Time: Don't Be Too Hard on Yourself
A Driver’s Training for Social Media Story
This month we’ve had the opportunity to connect with dozens of parents in live settings. They’re all in the same boat as us… trying to figure out how to navigate screens and the online world. We are all bombarded with news that easily makes us feel fearful or worried about whether or not we’re getting it right, but let us offer you a few thoughts to encourage families trying to manage tech in the home.
Don’t be too hard on yourself (or your kids and teens). While we can’t be dismissive of the negative effects of unchecked screen time, at the same time remember that apps are purposely designed to be addictive. It’s similar to how the food industry puts sugar in nearly everything. It’s hard to even find bacon without sugar! The tech deck is stacked against us.
We talk about this extensively in Driver’s Training for Social Media. Everything from endless scrolling to notifications to news headline curiosity gaps are all features of attention-driven design intended to keep us glued to screens.
Of course it still comes down to personal and parental responsibility, but the next time you get frustrated with yourself or family members, take a deep breath and remember it’s designed to trick you.All screen time isn’t created equal. During the Minnesota Timberwolves NBA playoff run, we broke all the screen time rules. In the first round against the Lakers, the games started at 9:30pm CST. It was the last thing we did before bed and the games ended a few hours before we had to wake up for work and school.
But… it’s something that’s a strong connection point for our family. There’s a huge difference between 2.5 hours cheering on your favorite team with family or friends and 2.5 hours scrolling TikTok or Instagram by yourself.
Whether it’s sports or Saturday morning YouTube shows or learning how to make sushi, co-viewing is a great way to use screens to bring you family closer together instead of apart.View your media plan and family rules as guiding principles. Tracking screen time shows us how we spend our time and can expose compulsions sparked by attention-driven design. While limiting screen time is the goal, viewing your media plan as guiding principles accommodates the ebb and flow of seasons and special moments while avoiding frustrations of not always hitting the mark. Guiding principles help bring you back when you stray off course.
Fill the void of less screen time with offline activities and goals. Because of convenience and attention-driven design, we’re likely to fill boredom or downtime with screens. Learn something new. Tackle that DIY project you’ve been putting off. Get outside. As a parent, you’re going to be tired no matter what, so why not use your time to invest in creating offline experiences instead of online battles?
Plan from a posture of power instead of fear. Have you ever been in the backseat of a vehicle with a bad driver? It’s terrifying because you have no control. The online world profits from fear and is wired to keep you in the backseat. The goal of our online course is to put (and keep) you in the driver’s seat… empowered with knowledge about this online “vehicle” you’re driving.
Be encouraged! Intentionality is the key. Do what works best for you and your family. Stay vigilant and let us know how we can help. You’ve got this!
Driver’s Training for Social Media is accessible to “Behind the Curtains” annual subscribers. What’s included in the online course?
Four Modules with Twelve Videos
Reflection/Discussion Questions
Action Ideas and Additional Links and Resources
Printable Companion Guide with a Screen Time Tracker, Case Study Activity, and Media Plan.